Unsuccessful people have all of the answers. Successful people have all of the questions. As crazy as that may sound, I believe it more and more each passing day. Recently, I met with Frank- a business owner who is absolutely crushing it, with multiple successful businesses, a great family and a healthy lifestyle. We talked for hours, the conversation weaving through three of those aspects of life. And no matter which topic the conversation turned towards, he was filled with questions and curiosity. He’d ask a question. We’d discuss. I’d give a thought or a suggestion. He’d affirm, ask another question or challenge my assertion. It led to me asking a question and him doing the same. Two hours later, it felt like we were talking for ten minutes. That’s how quickly the time flew by. Days later, Frank was already taking action on some of the things we had discussed. As was I. And he showed me, through his actions, that creating success isn’t nearly as hard as it’s made out to be. If you combine a massive amount of curiosity with intentional focus along with immediate action, you would be surprised how quickly things seem to happen. I also had a series of conversations recently with people who are trying to figure out their path. You can say they are struggling. You can say they are beginning. However you’d like to describe it, they aren’t close to where they want to be. And as much as I enjoyed those conversations as well, the style of those conversations was opposite from what it was like talking with Frank. During these conversations, they had answers. Not questions. And that always surprises me. If you aren’t where you want to be, why do you have so many answers? Frank is light years ahead of where they are and he was constantly looking for ways to make something better. In these other conversations, they were giving answers to why things wouldn’t work. “I’ve already tried that.” “I don’t want to do that.” “That wouldn’t work.” “That would take too much time.” “I don’t have any idea how to do that.” I left those conversations and wondered what that would have been like if they thought like Frank did? Instead of saying “I’ve already tried that,” I could hear him say, “What are you thinking?” Instead of saying “I don’t want to do that,” I could hear him say, “What am I missing here?” Instead of saying “That wouldn’t work,” I could hear him saying, “It didn’t work last time, but I’ve learned a ton since then. Why did you suggest that?” Instead of saying “That would take too much time,” I could hear him saying, “Why do you think it would be worth the time?” And instead of saying, “I don’t have any idea how to do that,” I could hear him saying, “Can you help me figure out how to do this?” Do you see the difference? When you have already determined the answer, there is little room for conversation, growth or learning. It’s like shutting the door on an idea or suggestion. I can be a tad pushy in these conversations. They don’t call me Pushy Pugliese for nothing. Often, I will be the one asking the questions when it should be them. In one of those conversations, someone mentioned that he didn’t have time to do one of the options suggested to him. Now, he didn’t have any clue yet what it entailed, but he had already concluded in his head that it would take too much time. I get to do this for a living so I have the suggestions, stories and responses already teed up. The thing that he said he didn’t have time for would amount to two hours a week of work. But earlier in the conversation, he noted that the work that he was currently doing- that would be replaced- takes seven hours per week. He didn’t see the irony or the connection. He didn’t see it because he already believed that he had the answer. So there was no need for any questions. That is exactly where dreams die, and we don’t even realize it. All it took was a little recap of what he had already told me to get him to see it differently. “So you can spend seven hours doing that work but you won’t replace it with only two hours doing this work? Not only would it get done better, but you would get an extra five hours per week.” That’s all it took to get that look. What is that look? That look on his face when he realized that his thinking was completely off, and he should start listening. Those are some of my favorite moments in coaching. When the struggling person who thinks they have all of the answers realizes that not only do they not have the answers, but that they suddenly have a ton of questions. And when answers change into questions, that’s when the real fun begins. Have an AMAZING day! Vincent | 
